Jul 1, 2010

Posted by in My Life's Quirks | 3 Comments

My Life’s Quirks – I am Canadian!

Today is July 1st!  That means it’s Canada Day – Canada’s birthday!  In honor of this occasion, I thought I would take some time to teach those of you who are not Canadian a thing or two that you might not already know.  Here goes:

Canada was born in 1867.  That makes us 143 years young.  Canada’s population is at about 34,000,000 people.  It’s not a lot considering the size of our country, but it’s more than 3.  So if you know someone who lives in Canada, there is a pretty good chance that I don’t know them too.

We are proud country, but we don’t brag too much about how awesome we are.  In fact, during the last winter Olympics (that were held in Vancouver) our Prime Minister had to go before Parliament to tell Canadians that it’s okay for us to show pride in our country – and that we can always apologize for it later…  Speaking of saying ‘sorry’ – yes, this myth is true.  I will express regret if someone runs into me on the street – even if it’s not my fault.  But I won’t hesitate giving him the finger behind his back if he doesn’t say sorry to me.  After all, it was the bastard’s fault!

Many Hollywood celebrities are Canadians:  Jim Carrey, Mike Myers, William Shatner, Michael J. Fox, the dude from Glee (great show!), Rachel McAdams, Ryan Gosling, Keanu Reeves, Ryan Reynolds, Alex Trebek and Seth Roban just to name a few.

We Canadians have so many things to be proud of:
Only in Canada….. can we claim responsibility for bringing these amazing inventions to the world:  the zipper, the television, the telephone, the paint roller, basketball as well as the AM radio.  And let’s not forget the Wonderbra.  Where would horny single women be on a Friday night without their Wonderbras?  Don’t get me wrong, they would still be in a seedy bar looking to hook up.  But now, it takes so much less time and effort to find that perfect one night stand thanks to the bazoomba hoisting bra.

We Canadians also have a few things that even we scratch our heads over:
Only in Canada……are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.
Only in Canada…..do people order double cheese burgers, large fries, and a diet coke.
Only in Canada……do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.
Only in Canada……do we buy hot dogs in packages of twelve and buns in packages of eight.
Only in Canada……do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.

We cook our food in real ovens – not open campfires in our back yard.  We don’t eat powdered bear testicles or whale blubber — why the hell would we?!…  We actually have running water and yes, we even have flushing toilets!  (We have for quite some time now)  We drive cars on roads that are, for at least 6 months of the year, not covered in snow and rock salt.  So that means no, it’s not constantly snowing and we don’t live in igloos.  Goodness, even the Inuit people don’t live in igloos anymore!  Besides, just take a look at a map.  At least parts of 17 American states are more northern than some parts of Canada!

We love the word “eh” (pronounced AY (similar, but not the same as huh) and why not?!  ‘Eh’ is a very useful word.  It is used in conjunction with other words, or simply by itself. The tone or slight differences in exclamation also changes its meaning.  Here are some of its most common uses:

Eh? = what did you say?
Eh? = what do you think?
EH? = something to say just to end a sentence.
Ehhhh!! = WOW!!
EH!? = what do you mean?
Eh?? = your joking!!!??
Eh! = sure!!
Eh…c’mon!! = well that’s early…but ok.
Eh…wanna? Eh? = lets fool around …
Hey…um..er eh… = I’m pregnant!
EH????????? = how did that happen?
Ehh…wha’d’ya think eh? = marry me.

*sniff sniff* (We Canadians are so romantic, eh?  That’s actually how Jason proposed to me!  Okay, not really.  He proposed in my living room while wearing a Backstreet Boys t-shirt – but that’s a story for some other time…)

We understand the sentence, “Could you please pass me a serviette, I just spilled my bowl of poutine!”
We eat chocolate bars instead of candy bars.
We drink pop, not soda.
We’re not sure if the leader of our nation has EVER had sex and we don’t WANT to know if he has!
We can drink legally while still a teen in some provinces.
We talk about the weather with strangers and friends alike.
We drive on a highway, not a freeway.
We dismiss all beers under 6% as “for children and the elderly.”
We wonder why there isn’t a 5 dollar coin yet to go with our 1 and 2 dollar coins (that we call loonies and toonies.)
We get excited whenever an American television show mentions Canada.
We can eat more than one maple sugar candy without feeling nauseous.
Back bacon and Kraft Dinner are two of your favourite food groups.
We design your Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit – just in case.
We’ve most likely taken your kids trick-or-treating in a blizzard.
We think sexy lingerie is tube-socks and a flannel nightie with only 8 buttons.
And our local paper covers national and international headlines on 2 pages, but requires 6 pages for hockey.

Well, that’s all I can think of.  I hope you guys learned a little bit of new information about Canada today.  I’ve been lucky to see most of my fair country – and it really is beautiful!  We are lucky to have what we have and we are also lucky enough to have neighbours that don’t bother us too much 😉

Check in on Sunday, July 4th for a ‘special edition’ of “My Life’s Quirks” — a post to honor the America’s Independence Day celebrations!

(I’m leaving you with this video.  It’s a commercial for Molson Canadian beer that aired in 2000.  It was hugely popular and it points out some of the things I mentioned above.  Enjoy!)

I am Canadian!  Just another one of my life’s quirks, eh.

  1. LOL
    Our ATM’s in the U.S. have the Braille lettering too! I never could figure out why.

    Happy Canada Day!



  2. Happy Canada Day!!

    “We drive on a highway, not a freeway”…we have both…weird i know.

    There’s a lot of things u guys do that diff parts of the US say….some say pop, soda, cola, coke….funny.

    The one thing u didnt address is…do u guys always say “hoser”? I remember that funny show w/those 2 candadian guys…they always used “eh” and “hoser”!!

    Good blog today Julie!!!

    ps….cant wait to hear about the backstreet boys shirt!! My son is going to their concert tonight…they couldnt sell enough tickets so they lowered the price to $10!!!

  3. Sharon, I’ve never used the word “hoser” nor have I ever heard anyone use the term “hoser”. I know which show you mean though…lol I do say ‘eh’, but not at the end of every sentence!

    Elizabeth, the same factory must spit out your and our atm machines. lol

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